Spirits, Angels and Skulls.. Oh My!

Yesterday started out as a typical work day. I was trying to finish this card before Halloween festivities began. This is The Blood Moon card from the Spirit De La Lune deck. It is a spooky, darker themed card and I LOVE it. At first I didn't. I showed a progress shot to Marissa  and she didn't like it either. Neither of us were "feeling" the original card. After working on it, and sending more and more progress shots, and discussing things, trying new things we felt right with this card. I worked on this card for about 12 hours and by the end, I was exhausted, but I'm totally in love. I loved Marissa's honesty and input. Collaborations need honesty, and I'm thankful that was provided here, because this final draft is so much better than the first. I knew there was something missing, and together we figured it out. I can't wait until this deck is done and in print. It's going to be beautiful.


After "work"Sterling and I dressed up as Witch Doctors, with a New Orleans feel. I channeled a past life a bit last in this costume. I even carried a gris gris bag, a poppet, and some cards!  I have very distinct memories of some of my past lives from the south. One is from the Civil War era where I first learned how to read Tarot Cards and other forms of divination and another life is from the 20s and 30s in New Orleans. I worked as a medicine woman in a small shop, and helped heal, bless, and make magick. I have more uncovering to do with these past lives, but I figured a good way to start would be dressing up as what I felt it would be like... though I don't think I wore a glow in the dark corset back then.

We spent the evening with Jenica and Jacob. Jenica went as an Earth Goddess, she wore parts of my fairy costume from a few years ago.. She looked so perfect in the dress, and it fit her so well! Jacob went as Ebola, but I some how don't have any pictures of him. He wore a black morph suit with glow sticks of the Ebola virus. 

We started the night out cooking dinner together. I love to cook, and I love to cook for and with other people. Even if my table only sits two and we squish together to try to eat, it's still fun. Later we went downtown for some drinks, but felt the crowds were a little much so we went to a little party where we danced, chatted, drank and had fun. I danced again. Never in my life have I had so many opportunities to dance. I'm not a fan of dancing. I don't enjoy it.. I feel terribly awkward. But yesterday, I danced with Sterling. Cause I figure, I would rather dance awkwardly than sit alone. 

Before we left I created an altar for Samhain, and Dia de los Muertos. This time of year, the veil between worlds is the thinnest, and I like to honor loved ones who have passed on. I also love to invite loved ones to visit for a few days in spirit. Yesterday we called on Jenica and Sterling's sister to come party with us. She was a baby when she passed away. Sterling never got to meet her on the Earthly plane, and I'm not sure how much memory Jenica has with her either. Though both of them recognize her spirit with them often. Yesterday Jenica and Sterling wanted a picture together, try as I might I couldn't get a picture without a light flair! I took about 5 pictures in a row, and there was always a light right between them. Jenica and Sterling aren't too clear, but it's clear their sister wanted to make an appearance! 

Today I woke up with a prompting to go to Dancing Cranes in search of a new deck. I have met a new Angel of mine recently and she's been telling me all sorts of things while I start to fall asleep, or wake up, and today she showed me images of a new deck. I've been wanting The Ascended Masters deck for quite some time now. Not to read with, but to learn with. (Though I'm sure I'll be doing readings with it soon.)  So after this morning's prompting I decided to go look for it. I even made Sterling Late for work! We went to Dancing Crane and had breakfast in the cafe together.. and then I was drawn to exactly where the deck was. 

This deck works with messages from The Ascended Masters. It's a deck that combines Mother Mary, Isis, Merlin, Jesus and so many more. I feel it's incredibly fitting for All Saints Day. 

This is my favorite time of year. Halloween, Samhain, Dia De Los Muertos, All Saints Day... They all have so much in common. A time to honor the darkness of death, and the lightness of life! Bringing the two of them together for a time of celebration, reconnection, and even rebirth. 

And today I woke up with an overwhelming sense of gratitude for this life I'm living. Even though the path has been hard, and I've dealt with loss, death, depression, and hardships.. I'm thankful for my ability to feel those things so deeply, because when you allow yourself to feel that spectrum of pain, you open yourself up to a whole new spectrum of happiness, and you feel all the positive feelings through and through. And I think that is worth it. 

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Special Day, with Special News! Announcing a Moon Oracle Deck, and my One Year Anniversary!

Today is kind of a big day for me... Just one year ago was one of the worst days of my life. I was laid off from my job again. It was the 3rd time in two years! I was teaching art to troubled youth. I taught for about 9 months before getting laid off.. where I switched to being a substitute. I was happy to be working with the same kids, sad I was no longer teaching art... but relieved I still had a job. Well a few months later I was laid off. It was a really really sad day for me, back then. I thought my world was over. No job, no way of making money. It was a scary day. 

But now it's a day that I celebrate. 

Today is my one year anniversary of doing this full time. 

I made a decision back then to do what I want to do. To do what I LOVE. And make money from it. And it's been a successful year. I haven't had to get into any extra debt, borrow money, or have a single late payment. And I'm so proud of myself. I'm a little sad because I feel my successes are very over looked in my family. I've always been the black sheep.. but this black sheep got a shade darker this year.. I don't always feel fully accepted., but this is something to be worked out another day, because after one year, I can say I fully accept myself, and am beyond proud. 


I remember the night I got laid off, Sterling and I went camping. I cried while sitting around the camp fire. Scared. So scared. Should I apply for another job? Fit into the mold my parents want? Should I try for government assistance? Would I have to move into a cheaper place? So many scary thoughts..... how would I feed myself? My pets? How would I afford rent!? 

But then I remembered affirmations. The whole time I worked at the school I would always think to myself how I wish I had more time for art. I would say stuff like "I am an artist. I want to do my art." I would repeat that phrase so often through out the day in hopes of reminding myself to do art when I got home. Well, I repeated it enough to where it came true. 

Sitting around the campfire that night I realized this is what I had wanted all along. I had been putting this thought out into the universe for so long that it came true! The universe doesn't always deliver how we want, but it does deliver. 

After I got over the shock, I went over a plan. 

I decided to offer Tarot Readings, and I'm still reading for Lotus Tarot.  Tarot has been a huge part of my year.. it's opened me up in so many ways.. and because I started reading Tarot full time, I started my own Tarot Deck. 

This year has been full of so many ups and downs.. and so many lessons. 

I struggled with depression this year more than ever. Not getting out of the house much really sucks.
But I've been learning to take my job anywhere I want! Which has helped out so much.

I also really struggled with waking up. Waking up has been the hardest part of this.. At school, my job started at 7:15. Now my job starts whenever I want it too.. But sometimes depression kept me in bed until noon.... or later.

I started meditating more, and doing yoga daily. I do 100 squats a day, and drink a lot of coffee. I get to have my hair pink whenever I want it, and eat breakfast in my underwear. I get to create art whenever I want. For fun, for money, for me, or for friends. It's been an amazing year. 

(Photo taken exactly one year ago today around that campfire) 

If I could visit Rachael from last year, sitting at the campfire scared and full of woe. I would tell her not to worry, and to trust herself. I would assure her, that in one year she would be extremely proud of her. Even if she felt totally alone in that pride. Because this is a very soul enriching path. 

And today on this very special day, I have another announcement! 

Marissa from Moondaughter  and I are teaming up for an Oracle Deck! This has been Marissa's idea for a few years and I''m so honored to be a part of this deck! It's going to feature mandalas and moon phases, and other spectacular things. I'm so excited. I love the way it's turning out! 
I trust Marissa's vision for this deck, and am having so much fun creating it. I once did a full concentration on Mandalas for an art class and had to do studies on their process as well as create several of my own. So I was extremely excited when we discussed Mandala cards. 

We've got three cards done so far.. but it's been a fun break from my Tarot Deck. I've been trying to work on the two simultaneously so they will be released around the same time. It's very refreshing to finish a Mandala, then start on a illustrated Tarot card. Once that's finished it's a refreshing break to do another Mandala. 

We are still deciding on a good name for the deck, so if you want to help leave a comment here, facebook, or instagram. If we like your name and choose it we will send you a free deck.

I want to finish this post with a sincere thank you to those who have supported me. In Tarot Readings, paintings, the Tarot Deck, Moon Deck... those who have read the books I illustrated. (Another one is coming out in a month! ) Those who read this blog, everyone who supports me. Thank you. From the bottom of my heart. This has been a scary year, but wow, it's been so rewarding... and I couldn't have done it without your support. 

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