Monday, June 24, 2013


Note: this post has random pictures from the newly reopened shop. I'm blogging from my phone and its a bit tricky to do picture placements.. 

This weekend was filled with projects, cleaning the house, weeding the garden, planting, art making and even making hats. It's really interesting to be getting back into making hats after having the shop closed for almost a year. It's fun seeing such old pictures of me, and redoing hats that I designed years ago. It's scary for some reason, and I can't quite put my finger on why it's scary. Because it shouldn't be. And it's not all scary. At all. It's good. Almost like jumping back into a memory, but knowing that things will be a bit different now. I'm getting used to going to 3 craft stores a day, and ordering bulk packaging.. And I'm hoping Sterling can get used to me saying, "Sorry, I don't want to go out, I have hats to make." 

When I was divorced, my hat business and my blog was said to be a major part of the troubles of the marriage. Because I had to run my business I never had time for him.. Which I am convinced that was NOT the major reason, but it does scare my for this current relationship. My ex hated my blog, and my photos, my art, and my hats. He made them out to be burdens, and I can't help but still feel that when I tell Sterling, "I've got to go find this yarn, then get shipping supplies, then go home and MAKE the hats.. Sorry." He always wants to know WHY I'm sorry... And I think it's just because I was conditioned to believe my joys, hobbies and creations have been a burden. 
And now I'm almost in tears for this realization... 
And I've figured out why I've been scared. And I'm trying not to be scared. 
Because ones hobbies shouldn't be a burden to anyone. And you shouldn't be ashamed or afraid to do what you love. 
Wow. Good therapy session. Thanks for listening. 


  1. You make my Counselor heart so happy! I'm glad that you've figured out the root of your guilt over your hobbies. Figuring out what is broken is the first step to figure out how to fix it.

    It sounds to me like your ex had some big issues within himself that he decided to project onto you. He sounds like poison. I'm so glad your done with him and free to let your heart be happy. <3

  2. You are so right! Even juggling work and a small child, my husband is supportive of my hobbies. He has his Magic cards and Let's and I have my art. We give eachother time to go out and do our hobbies without guilt. Its a must in a good relationship.

  3. Rachael anyone that loves another loves them entirely. We may not enjoy the same things & hobbies, but we never love a piece of someone. That just is senseless to me. I'm so happy for you that your journey has taken this turn. Peace, love & such joy to you!

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  5. It sounds like Sterling loves you for you, which includes your hobbies and other things that make you happy! My husband hates going thrifting and antiquing with me, but he knows it makes me happy, so he tags along (occasionally kicking and screaming) because he wants to be a part of what makes me happy. I hate watching golf, but you better believe I sat and watched the entire freaking US open last week because I wanted to be a part of what makes him happy too. It took me 5 years to stop apologizing for the things I love, and it was all because Bryant would tell me never to be sorry about something I want. I have a feeling Sterling wants that for you too :-)

  6. Well, I could have written that post. Because I don't make a lot of money with arts & crafts, my boyfriend treats me like it's all a big waste of time and that I'm just delusional thinking I'm actually 'working.' Things are really stressful right now. He hates my blogs, like this post here would make him livid. It's hard to blog a lot and NEVER mention the person you live with. I guess that's what he wants though.

    1. When I was married to my ex, I never really mentioned him, or anything. It was rough. I'm sorry you are in that!


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