I'm having a bit of a frustrating day today. I'm frustrated with bills, and when my printer doesn't work, and why my bank account just won't stay full and as soon as I get some money in, bills come out of no where.. and then the printer jams, then runs out of ink as soon as it works. Then there is no gas in the car to get the ink, and by dinner time, I've forgotten to defrost the food to cook. And the house is a mess, and my mind is a mess and I'm wondering how much of this is actually worth it. Maybe I'd like to just crawl under the covers for a while and wish I could just disappear because this is just getting too hard. And I would love to nap for a long long time, but I'm just too busy even for that. I'm working way too hard to be this stressed and poor. I know that I'm not alone in this, but I am feeling like a one woman show and I'm so so tired.
These thoughts are making my mind clouded and my heart very heavy.
And quite honestly, I'm feeling very bound..
tied up, limited, trapped.
Acrylic on Canvas
I guess I'm just feeling very low lately.
Maybe it's all catching up to me, or it's that time of the month, or the moon..
Or a combination of all of that.
But, I do know, this is all natural.
It's a natural part of growing.
I know I'm not the only one who ever feels this way,
and I know it certainly won't last. I know I'm way too stubborn to give up.
But, the funny thing with the word bound, is that it has two meanings.
Sure one meaning is to be limited and tied...
But here is the definition I like best.
intr.v. bound·ed, bound·ing, bounds
1. To leap forward or upward; spring.
2. To progress by forward leaps or springs.
3. To bounce; rebound.
1. A leap; a jump.
2. A rebound; a bounce.
So, I'm working on changing my perception.. from being binded and feeling
I will break from the ties that bind me, and I will bound forth.
It is during our darkest moments that we must focus to see the light.