Friday, November 18, 2011

Best Year For My Life

You are probably thinking that the title of this should read, "Best Year Of My Life."
But it was not.

It's been nearly a year since I came home.
Maybe a couple of days shy.

One year ago, I gathered up all of my courage, and all of my belongings, 
my cute little puppy, and all the money I had been saving..
rented a car and drove cross country on 2 hours of sleep.

I left a lot of stuff in Memphis,
hats, artwork, a few blankets, and an abusive marriage.
And I never looked back.

I tried to start the year off great.
A fresh start,
but Mowgli passing away was the hardest thing I've ever had to face.

This post isn't meant to be a sad "pity me" post.
So, I won't even bother to list all my other woes and worries of this year.

This year wasn't the best of my life..
it certainly was the best for it.

A lot has happened for me this year.

I've come to terms with my parents about my beliefs.
And in Utah, that is a big deal.
But, I like not living under the pressure of needing to be something others want you to be.
This could be a whole blog post in itself, but I won't be posting that.
I also don't want to offend anyone.
Just know,
I'm happier now then ever.

I've been really trying to focus on my art.
I would love to have making art a full time career like it use to be.
 It's a life long dream of mine, and I promise it will happen.

I've been trying to not focus on hat making, since I would rather be making art.
This one is a tricky one since Talk2thetrees is more established than TreeTalker art.
But it's something I will focus on even more next year. 

I've gained a lot and I've lost a lot.
But, the things I've gained have been very great.

In just one year, I've gained:
A loving and handsome boyfriend who tells me I'm beautiful every day.
(I'm not used to that!)
A wonderful group of friends, who I think laughs at my jokes.
(It's been a long time since I've even had friends!)
A car that is older than me, but still drives.
(It's so old I have to hit the dashboard in order for the clock to work!! (I feel like I'm in a movie))
Two silly and stinky puppies who love to snuggle.
(They are both quite dramatic too)
An very small apartment with thin walls and ceilings.
(But, it's an apartment!)

I could keep listing things.
I really could.
This is the flock of birds I saw while I was packing up my car to drive to Utah.
They were a big sign to me.
They were in that tree for just an instance.
Then they were gone.

They flew away for the winter..
because as hard as change can be,
it's often for the better.

So, I'm going to start of this new year with the same mindset as before,
that things are going to be great. 
And let the wind take me wherever I need to go.
And maybe next year, will be even better for my life.
My dear blog readers..
some of you have been reading this blog for years.
You've been with me all the way.
Every one of your thoughtful comments and emails are read and taken to heart.
This blog has helped me a lot through this year, 
but it wouldn't have if my blog friends were there for me.
Thank you, from the bottom of my heart.


  1. I am so glad that this has been the best year for your life!!! I so enjoy reading your blog + talking to you on twitter!! You are such a sweetheart, so talented and inspiring. I hope that this year, next year and forever brings you much happiness, you deserve it!!! xoxo

  2. you are so strong! i only wish that one day i can be as strong as you are. you're such an inspiration to me and i'm sure so many other girls out there.

  3. You're such an inspiration. Stay strong and keep moving forward. <3

  4. You have come so far! It takes a lot of courage to do what you've done. Thanks for being an inspiration to everyone around you!

  5. Thank you so much Megan! You are one of the people I was talking about, I feel like we've "known" each other for a while.. :)
    Thank you anonymous!
    Thanks so much Mckella! I'm glad I get to know you in real life!!

  6. I am very happy for you! I started reading your blog when things happened with Mowgli and I love coming by to see how you're doing! Keep moving forward! xxx

  7. Thank you Chrissy! You are so sweet. :)

  8. Wow i am so happy for you. I've been reading your blog for over a year now. I remember when you were leaving last year and i remember checking your twitter like every day for more information to see if you were okay. and when Wicket passed i cried too. Its funny how close connections are formed over blogging even though you never see the person. I'm very glad you are happy now. Here's to an ever better next year!

  9. this gave me so much HOPE, rachael... and i am so proud of how far you have come and how happy you are! i've been following you for about 2 years, and i swear if i knew you in real life i'd give you the biggest hug ever.

    i remember emailing you when mowgli passed, because it was around the same time that my ferret imogen passed.. and how much of a comfort you were to me without even realizing it. and now, i look at the time period from when you left your ex and i am again shocked, because i left my husband this month.

    i remember reading a post that you wrote last year right before you left, about feeling alone without being alone... and ever since you wrote that i've thought that i've been relating to that a little too closely. that i deserve to be happy, and to not be alone in my marriage anymore.

    it's such an inspiration to see and meet people who have come out of bad situations even stronger -- and to know that even if the future seems impossible at the moment, hapiness is just around the corner :)

    so with that said, happy anniversary!

    xx, kara

  10. This is so beautiful to read. I've only been following your blog for a few months, but now I want to go back. I went through a divorce when I was 26 (I'm almost 30) and reading here about your journey sparks warm memories of the distance I came too. You have a wonderful way of capturing the freedom that comes from a difficult choice, and the adventure that tumbles after! Love it.

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  12. so touching!! i'm so proud of you. love you friend! xo

  13. thank you for this post.
    i lost my cat today, and am pretty much in pieces. i just don't know what to do.
    i actually came onto your blog to re-read your posts about mowgli, i've been reading your blog for so long now, and just wanted to know that i'm not alone in this feeling.
    i think i will write a post like this soon- i need to remember that for every negative thing there is a bad. things are hard, but i know i have a lot to be grateful for.
    sorry, this turned into a bit of a ramble, but basically- thank you x

  14. Thank you all for you supportive comments!
    Kara, you and I HAVE been blog friends for a long time! I'm sorry to hear about you and your husband, it's hard.. and I'm sure it's for the best! Send me an email if you'd like to talk!
    Georgia! Thank you! Divorce is hard, but it was seriously such a wonderful choice.. life still has it's downs.. but I'm still happy!
    Mindy! Thank you!! I miss you so much, I hope one day we can be real life friends again!
    Skye- I'm so incredibly sorry for your loss... I'm going to hop over to your blog, and try to leave a better comment.

  15. You deserve this beautiful new change in your life, lovely! I loved hearing how far you've come and in only a year. ♥ I'll admit, mine and Jen's lives have been so very different this year as well and all for the better. I know at least two people, other than you and us, who have changed their entire lives this year. It's a good year for change and I think next year will be even better.

    Have a gorgeous night!

  16. I haven't been a follower as long as the others here. But it's always a delight to stop by & hear what you are up to. Your posts are always so inspiring & immediately lift my spirits. I'm so happy I met you thru blogging. Hugs sweetie!!

  17. this post gave me goosebumps from head to toe. even though we've never met, i'm proud of you and very inspired by your journey and wisdom. thank you again for sharing your journey and thoughts with us! you deserve all the good bits in life.

  18. i feel like that comment didn't do justice to the many times i've had a hard day and come to read your blog and been so uplifted. yours is the most genuine, relatable blog out of the many i've come across in the past couple years. no matter if your posts are positive or you're going through a rough patch, you remind us all that we're ok. it's ok to struggle and have hard days. but that's no reason not to follow our bliss anyway. keep following yours, and we will love following along with you through this space!

  19. What a beautiful post! Very inspirational.
    I follow you on tumblr, and this is the first time I'm actually introducing myself - so nice to meet you,I'm Sivan.
    I wish you an amazing year! You seem to deserve it.

  20. just discovered your blog and i'm blown away by your words and images. xx

  21. I know TT2T since only few months.
    Immediately has become my favorite site...
    Is the first page I open when I connecting.
    Your words are all filled with emotions. They are full of sincerity. Are that direct. It's tangible your genuineness... That's why I love your blog. You leave a great space to emotions... Emotions are what remains of our Instinct... That makes us more human than "humans". Brings us back to Nature, to the Earth and Ground.
    I read a lot about you, about your life on your blog...
    I found everything I love in here...
    The Trees...
    Wonderful shots...
    And a beautiful Human Girl.
    I've got few human Friends because I lost a little faith in human... That's why I'm sorrounded by puppies, cats, birds, plants and drawings but People like you are making the world a nice place to live.
    To me, you look like the protagonist of a Fairy Tale... A tale that talks about a sweet girl with some troubles... A little bit like Dorothy, of the Wonderful the Wizard of Oz... One of my favorite tales.
    I hope to you, that every year will be better than the last.
    Like someone said before me, this post gave me a lot of Hope...
    In the People, in the Life... Makes me think that life can change...
    Nietzsche said "One must have chaos in oneself in order to give birth to a dancing star"... We are used to refer to the sun as something that goes away, going down... but it's not true. In facts the Sun is always in his relative way... There are clouds that sometimes are covering the Sun... But the Sun is always there. And that is what we are... We're like Stars... We are a Sun that always shines but sometimes we have bad days, bad years, bad or wrong relationships, we live through very bad moments but behind the clouds, there we are... We're not sinking, we're not away...
    So Rachael, have a wonderful life... Filled in emotions and nice days. This is my prayer for you... Keep giving us such emotions :)

  22. This post is by far one of my favorites, even though I haven't been a follower for very long. I love your courage to change your life when you want to and how you can see the good in everything.
    Of course I am sorry for Mowgli, but life has it's ups and downs and I appreciate your honesty and sincere posts despite that.

  23. This post meant a lot to me. You sound like you've come a long way this past year. I know on bad days I find myself running to your blog hoping to see a post about something positive, and you never disappoint me! I'm so very proud of you for having the courage to leave an old life that wasn't working and venture out to find a new path. I hope 2012 is an absolutely amazing year for you, Rachael. <3

  24. I'm so glad you learned big things this year. With every new year comes new dreams and goals and chances to grow stronger and better yourself. I hope 2012 is a wonderful year for you Rachael! :)


  25. It takes a strong person to take control of their life and make the changes that you have made. You are an inspiration.

  26. This is going to sound really random but what kind of hairstyle do you have? Its really cute and im thinking about cutting my hair like it

  27. Thanks Anonymous! I'm not sure what I would call this hair cut... perhaps a pixie cut? I don't know... I never get it cut professionally, so I never have to ask anyone to cut, I just start cutting!

  28. You go girl! Sometimes you just have to do what is best for you! Stay strong and I know that your dreams will come true!


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